PDA

View Full Version : Shower habits and gender.


88 PS190
12-15-2006, 10:32 PM
Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.. If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and
sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super
absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub
the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull
off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.

Throw wet towel on her pillow.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind
this, there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day!
Oh, and... woo-woo!!!

Bobbyk
12-15-2006, 10:48 PM
I couldn't have said it better:)

atlfootr
12-15-2006, 11:03 PM
I'll go and do these right now, and tell you the results tomorrow!

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

trickskier
12-16-2006, 08:47 AM
That's GREAT!!!!

TMCNo1
12-16-2006, 08:55 AM
The best of both worlds is take a shower with her, saves water!

trickskier
12-16-2006, 09:05 AM
The best of both worlds is take a shower with her, saves water!
We do.....Our shower has 2 shower heads, walk-in, glass block, no doors.

agua4fun
12-16-2006, 09:12 AM
We do.....Our shower has 2 shower heads, walk-in, glass block, no doors.


How do you get in, if it has no doors?? :D

trickskier
12-16-2006, 09:48 AM
How do you get in, if it has no doors?? :D
Just walk-in, 3 walls & an opening. Gets quite COLD in the winter 14' ceiling in the bathroom.

JohnnyB
12-16-2006, 09:53 AM
ROFLMFAA.....too many truths to both. Well written:D

Laurel_Lake_Skier
12-16-2006, 10:01 AM
That's great.....a good laugh out loud. Still trying to figure out if my wife will think its funny or not. The sense of humor varies as much as the shower habits.

TMCNo1
12-16-2006, 10:10 AM
That's great.....a good laugh out loud. Still trying to figure out if my wife will think its funny or not. The sense of humor varies as much as the shower habits.


Video tape her, then she video tapes you, then the two of you review the tapes together and she will get it!

88 PS190
12-16-2006, 12:26 PM
Wooo Woooo

André
12-16-2006, 01:42 PM
We do.....Our shower has 2 shower heads, walk-in, glass block, no doors.
Same here.
4' x 6' shower with 2 outlets and controls.
Good things have happenned in there...;)

suedv
12-16-2006, 01:48 PM
Good laugh, but honestly there is no way I would go through all that work just to take a stupid shower. :rolleyes:

suedv
12-18-2006, 10:32 PM
OK, maybe I spoke too soon. While there is no way I would go to all that work to take a shower, our college age daughter is home for Christmas break. We've got the full supply of beauty products in our house now. :)

DrNautica
12-18-2006, 10:43 PM
Just walk-in, 3 walls & an opening. Gets quite COLD in the winter 14' ceiling in the bathroom.



So... you live in a barn???:D

mbeach
12-18-2006, 11:35 PM
i've seen this before, but laugh out loud every time i read it especially the part about the butt hairs in soap and ability to produce a trophy fart in the shower due to the resonance of the 4 walls. tricks could not do this since he has only 3 walls and the highest quality is produced with 4 walls. besides, i bet the misses does not enjoy a good fart as much as he does - must be a testosterone thang!

TMCNo1
12-19-2006, 08:48 AM
i've seen this before, but laugh out loud every time i read it especially the part about the butt hairs in soap and ability to produce a trophy fart in the shower due to the resonance of the 4 walls. tricks could not do this since he has only 3 walls and the highest quality is produced with 4 walls. besides, i bet the misses does not enjoy a good fart as much as he does - must be a testosterone thang!

BTDT, best way to ruin a romantic evening and waste a perfectly good Viagra!

TMCNo1
12-19-2006, 11:44 AM
My wife posted this on our shower wall sometime back!

trickskier
12-19-2006, 11:50 AM
So... you live in a barn???:D

LOL....No, but the bathroom is about as big as a barn. :D

kycat2007
12-19-2006, 12:39 PM
Sometimes I think my girlfriend acts more like the guy. She sometimes hocks a lugy in the shower and walks around naked. I think she likes to tease.

trickskier
12-19-2006, 01:10 PM
Sometimes I think my girlfriend acts more like the guy. She sometimes hocks a lugy in the shower and walks around naked. I think she likes to tease.

WOW!!!! That's just too much information....... :uglyhamme

Jesus_Freak
12-19-2006, 01:33 PM
i've seen this before, but laugh out loud every time i read...

Agreed....seen it before, but still crying while reading. Thanks.

mbeach
12-19-2006, 05:59 PM
My wife posted this on our shower wall sometime back!
too funny, wives can be clever. where did she get it?

mbeach
12-19-2006, 06:01 PM
BTDT, best way to ruin a romantic evening and waste a perfectly good Viagra!
especially if the guy is the fartee and the gal is the fartor:D

milkmania
02-27-2007, 10:16 PM
Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.. If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and
sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super
absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub
the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull
off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.

Throw wet towel on her pillow.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind
this, there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day!
Oh, and... woo-woo!!!

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/412867/how_to_shower_men_women/